Tag Archives: Carrie Underwood

Almost Bulletproof

Who decides what cheating is? Some define it as a kiss; others say it’s when you sleep with another person. But doesn’t it feel like cheating when someone is together with you and they have feeling for someone else?

I have one rule when it comes to relationships: if I like someone else I tell the guy I’m in a relationship with and break up (unless he refuses for some reason of course). I don’t have the heart to lie to a boy saying that I have feelings for him, when in fact my heart belongs to someone else. I could never kiss someone, and far from sleep with someone. And when the guy you’re “dating” knows this about you, wouldn’t the same rules apply to him as well? Maybe not, but it would be nice to know. Wouldn’t it?

Apparently I’ve been lied to for quite some time. Correction: almost trough the whole relationship. I did realize something was off, but I didn’t have proof. Now, some months after it ended I hear about it. I don’t really care: I’m over him. But I am a bit angry because I could never do that to him, and he knew that. I feel as if guys just use my trust to have “fun”. It hurts. Not because I love him, but because I put my trust in the wrong guy and believed his lies.

It’s all in the past and doesn’t really matter, but guys should know by now: a woman/girl always knows. We may not be bulletproof, but we know when something is off. Still we stick with him and tell ourselves that it will end and he will come to realize that we love him. He knows we will never leave and uses it to it’s full potential, until one day we leave. Yes, we’re brave when we want to be.

But boys: don’t, ‘cause she will know!

“Maybe next time he’ll think before he cheats!” Carrie Underwood – Before He Cheats (Some Hearts – 2005)

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The Cinderella-dream

I guess I’ve always believed in the fairytale endings. The Romeo and Juliet, two people destined to meet and fall in love. Cinderella and the prince, live happily ever after. But as I grow up and see all the pain and heartbreak around me it’s harder and harder to believe in this theory.

When I was six years old I sincerely believed that my first boyfriend would be my last. We would meet young, get married by the time we were 20, and have two kids – two identical-boy-twins. As I grew older this vision of mine change drastically. I saw all the pain a boy could make. One little, stupid, ego boy could ruin a whole life.

I don’t know when I realized all this, but somewhere down the road I started thinking of boys as devils. Yes, they’re like devils in disguise. In daytime they lurk you in, and when the moon rises up they tear out you heart and make you feel those feelings you don’t want to feel (yes, this is similar the way Carrie Underwood described it in her song “Cowboy Casanova”). I don’t think they do it on purpose, but I still place every boy in this category. Even though I believe that out there there’s a boy who will never leave me, never stop loving me, never hurt me and never hide anything for me. Still, I haven’t categorized any boy under this category yet.

Why don’t girls trust boys? Well, some does, but deep inside: we really don’t trust them. We’re born not to trust. We’re born with a jealous heart. Again, not every girl is like this. I mean we trust, we just don’t fully trust. We’ve got out guards up to not get hurt, but often they are the ones who’ll burn us. You know: you come to a conclusion, say he’s cheating, but really he was planning a surprise for you. This leads to a fight, which eventually leads to two broken hearts, all because a woman can never fully trust. Or maybe it’s the man who is sneaky and is never really trustworthy? I’m really no the one to jump to a conclusion on this subject; I’m just airing my thoughts.

Now, when it comes to boys understanding of women: we are not all that complicated! We just want to feel loved and safe. We want to feel special. That isn’t all that hard is it, to give a compliment once in a while, or to ask, “How was your day?” and truly care about the answer? It doesn’t take all that much energy, really! Open you mouth and talk, that’s all. Think all of the marriages that would be saved if people just talked, and really said what was on their mind. Well, some were domed form the start, but it would have helped a bit at least.

Back to the Cinderella-dream: every little girl dreams of real love and a happily ever after, but what about boys? In the teenage years it seems like most of them only want to get a girl in to bed, and never really get their feelings involved. Do they dream about happily ever after? Or does one need two X chromosomes’ to have this dream?

After airing my thoughts I’ve reached this conclusion: when I find that boy who have “the Cinderella-dream”, and who will never cheat on me I’m never letting go!

“Am I a stupid girl, for even dreaming that I could?” Katy Perry – Not Like The Movies (Teenage Dream – 2010)